~~STORY SPOILERS BELOW~~
If you haven’t read The Mean Girl Who Never Speaks yet, please stop reading this blog post because I’m going to spoil the story’s ending… Okay, let’s start! The story features Detective Mya Dove. She investigates Libby Smith, a girl at school who never speaks, smiles or plays with others. Mya reveals that Libby acts this way because she has selective mutism.
What is Selective Mutism (SM)?
Selective mutism (SM) — also known as Situational Mutism — means sometimes the person is extremely nervous when they speak. They’re comfortable speaking to some people, like close family or best friends, but are very quiet or silent around others. Selectively mute people do want to speak, but find it extremely hard to do so.
What inspired this selective mutism story?
Writers are told to write about what they know. I know about selective mutism because I am selectively mute. It affects me every day and stops me from doing certain things. For example, I would love to visit schools to share my stories with children, but it’s too scary for me. I tried it once and was treated so nicely by the staff and students, but I struggled so much.
There are others like me out there. It feels good to raise awareness of selective mutism for them. Most people have never heard of SM, even though it affects 1 in 140 children. That’s why this selective mutism story is so important! The sooner SM is diagnosed, the sooner children can get treatment. Unfortunately it’s harder to treat adults like me, but not impossible. By the grace of God, I have hope that one day I’ll speak without fear!
Do you know someone who has selective mutism?
Maybe you do. Here are some SM signs, according to SMIRA (Selective Mutism Information & Research Association) and the NHS (Britain’s healthcare service):
- Speaks freely in some situations but stays silent other times.
- May be expressionless e.g. not smile.
- May freeze when they’re expected to speak.
- Their quietness isn’t explained by another speech problem e.g. stuttering.
- Avoids eye contact.
- Their movement is stiff or tense.
- Uses gestures instead of speaking e.g. shakes their head.
- Says as few words as possible.
- They mumble or whisper.
- Looks nervous in social situations.
Those are common SM signs, but not a complete list.
Can selectively mute people get better?
Yes, we can! There is treatment available, so contact a doctor and/or therapist. The most popular and effective treatment is therapy, particularly Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT). CBT reveals the connection between our thoughts, feelings and actions. With treatment, children can get better, so it’s very important to get diagnosed and treated ASAP. It’s not too late for adults like me, but it’s much harder to change because we’ve been socially anxious for so long.
How can you help a selectively mute person?
There are many ways to help us manage our condition. Here are six useful tips:
- “Say something!” – Please don’t say this. It puts us on the spot and makes us more nervous about speaking.
- “It’s okay, you can write something instead of speaking.” – We might send handwritten notes, messages online or emails instead of speaking. Please let us write essays or give written presentations instead of giving speeches. Or you could let us give a speech to only one or two people, ideally people we know.
- “You’re so quiet!” – Please don’t mention how often we speak. It makes us feel bad about not talking.
- Please don’t ignore us. It makes us feel invisible and unwanted.
- “It’s fine, take your time.” – Thanks for being patient with us. We’re trying our best to speak. We appreciate your compassion and understanding.
- “How can I help you?” – Ask us to write down, email or text ways you could help us. Please don’t do anything that makes you feel uncomfortable, breaks any rules or is against the law.
I wanted to share what inspired The Mean Girl Who Never Speaks, a selective mutism story. The next book I’ll discuss will be The School Pet Who Went Missing. If you want to know what inspired that story, sign up to my mailing list for future updates.
